Day 80 : 11. The Principle of Relationships as Agreements

11. The Principle of Relationships as Agreements

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Individuals coming together to support the manifestation of the best possible versions of ourselves and each other. Nurturing each other's potential and supporting one another to transform weaknesses into strengths. Creating a safe space for the healthy expression of intimacy and sexuality. ( source: https://desteni.org/about-us/desteni-principles) 

My last relationship wasn't based on agreement at all. It was purely based on feelings. The problems with that is that feeling have no structure, so when that fussy feeling of love that make us feel warm inside disappear, the relationship collapse. 

We were not focus on nurturing each other potential, our focus was to nurture our own self interest. It's almost if we were both having in the back of our mind : '' how much can I take from this person so I can generate that feeling of love that make me feel really good'' That was fucked. 

Now after a while walking my process for a while, I can see why relationships based on principles are a very solid foundation for a stable relationship, because principle are stable, feelings are not. How could we build a skyscraper without a solid foundation. 

Now it's seems easy on paper, but in real life application it's a constant process of self-introspection where I will have to investigate every point within me where I will have the desire to put ''me'' first instead of ''what's best for both of us'' first. The good thing is that I have all the tools available to walk through those point.