Day 58: When we have nothing left to hide... we are free!

I was pondering about the concept of freedom.
One teacher have explain me that freedom was having nothing left to lose.
In some way, it's true, but I thing that there's still place for misinterpretation.
People then start thinking that freedom is being free from relationship or material possession, but even those that doesn't have physical possession, are still possess. Possess by the mind. That little voice in the head that judge all the time is possessing the physical body and create an inner hell in every human being. Nobody talk about it. Everyone is ashamed of what's going on in their secret mind.

The mind/ego is operating in secret and his deepest fear is to be exposed. You don't believe that don't you ? Think about that this way.

Let's imagine that every thought that you have would be recorded on a tape and written on paper. All the judgments, fears, secret desire,  all on tape. All the pictures that you have created in your mind, put on video tape. Then we take all library of your mind and we make it accessible to every human being on this planet. Everybody can look at every single thought that you have in your mind. How would you feel about that.

If you are not comfortable being completely exposed, that show that you have something to hide. And because you have something to hide, you are in a perpetual state of fear. The fear of being exposed.

Now let's imagine that your entire thinking would be thought of consideration for all life. No judgments at all, no manipulation, no fear. Complete self-honesty. Would you be afraid having your mind exposed to the entire planet? No you would not have anything to hide. Therefore you would not have any fear. You could operate in this world without having that perpetual fear that someone could discover what's happening in your secret mind. That sounds like REAL freedom to me.

As long as we have the intention of doing what's NOT best for all life, we will have something to hide and we will remain a slave of our mind.

Do you want to live a life of freedom or slavery ?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as long as I have something to hide, I cannot be free

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take responsibility for everything that is happening in the secret mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that freedom is not about having nothing left to lose, it's about having nothing left to hide.

When I found myself having a thought that doesn't consider all life, I stop and breath.

I commit myself to walk my process and deconstruct every programs/patters that doesn't consider all life

I commit myself to be aware of the consequence of the secret mind

Day 57 : Sooner or later, we have to face ourselves

It's incredible all the path that we can take in order to avoid facing ourselves. I have personally try many of them until I reach to point of self honesty and start walking in reverse.Here's few example of paths that I have tried in my quest to find myself, to finally realize that I was in fact avoiding facing myself.

Being a workaholic : My plan was clear. I didn't want to work my entire life, so I am going to work like a maniac. At that time I was uneducated so my plan had 0% to work, but I noticed that I while I was focus on working, I was feeling kind of good, because it was keeping me distracted from facing my inner hell. It work for a while until I end up in a complete burnout.

Being a travel Junkie : After feeling trapped and stuck in a job for so long, I came to the conclusion that there's more in this world than working, so I started travelling and really enjoy it. Again, travelling the world was preventing myself to face my inner world.

Relationship: while I was feeling love I didn't have to face the inner turmoil inside of me. Unfortunately, relationship based on feelings doesn't last very long, so when the love as feeling start to vanish, the relation is very soon also gone.

Get drunk ! : That as always been one of my favourite escape route. Alcohol always make me feel fantastic. It's almost like if every limits was remove from me and the background noise/fear also disappear. it's always give me a great sense of relief. Unfortunately, alcohol is also another way to avoid facing what is going on inside of me. I many case I have drink too much and do thing that I have regrets for months.

Self-betterment: Let's become more! meditation, positive thinking, light work etc. I have try and test everything under the sun. On the surface, it seems that I was experiencing some change, but at the core I was still fucked. Because what I didn't realize at that time is that self-betterment was in fact increasing the gap between me and other human being, and I was again avoiding facing myself. I went very far into my delusion until my identity based on delusion completely collapse.

After I have gone through those various path, I had no where else to go. I had to face myself in complete self-honesty. I had to be honest about the fact that none of those path had work for me to ''find myself''. Then I had been exposed to the Desteni tool and after a while I really start to understand what I was doing by trying all those various path: I was avoiding facing myself. I was dishonest about the fact that I wasn't really changing. I was not becoming a better person ( better here define as someone who consider all life).



Every road lead to self-honesty, sooner or later we have to face ourselves. What I found is that sooner is better than later. Many people die, without having ever came to the realization that they must face the consequence of what they have accepted and allowed to become. What happen when we die? I cannot answers this question for the moment, but I won't wait to get there. I will walk this process here in this life on this earth, because it make sense to do it.

The bad news is that it take 7 years to deconstruct the entire lie that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to become, the good news is that event one months of real dedicate application is enough to start seeing significant results.

I have recently ended my delusion, and it was the most liberating thing  I have ever experience. I know I have huge amount of work to do, but with the results that I am experiencing so far, I know I am not gonna back up. There's no other way out any way.

What better way could exist than the way of what is best for all life ?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid facing myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distract myself from facing the consequences of what I have accepted and allowed myself to become